I got the deciding letter confirming or denying my acceptance to the University of Colorado today. The first paragraph is classic: an emotional roller-coaster ride. I’ll just paste it in for you:
I am pleased to acknowledge your interest in attending the University of Colorado at Boulder. After careful review of your application, we are unable to offer you admission to the College of Engineering and Applied Science [awww...]. However, in light of your past academic performance, I would like to offer you admission to the College of Arts and Sciences [wait—what? I'm.. wait.. what? Let me, um, I'm, um, accepted, er...?] I do hope that you will accept our offer of admission to this college and choose to attend CU-Boudler. [Er, okay, cool.]
So that makes me happy, if confused (you should have seen the other documents included; they’re even more ambiguous). I figure I can enter the A&S college and switch over to CS from there… If I want to.
My original plan was to major in computer science and fly through it, so I can get into CMU for grad school and learn something from the masters (no pun intended). But after my slackerly and bored performance in “Advanced” Java at front range, I’m not sure “flying though” would be the best option for me. I need something that interests me, at least a little. CS is a lot of work, and I’m not the type of person to put up with a lot of work when I’m bored.
So perhaps I’ll go back to my plan B, which was the interesting as opposed to strategic one. I could major in mathematics with a minor in theory and composition. Or double major in those. Or do one of those and minor in linguistics. Considering all this, I’ll probably wait until my second year to declare my major/minor—there’s just too much damn stuff I’m interested in.
But yay, I was accepted. This was by no means expected, but not to say entirely unexpected.
I want to kick the door
I want to smash my screen
I want to break the window
I want to rake her face
I want to rip the drum
I want to yell
I wanna Yell
it’s all too quiet
I mean It’s All Too Quiet
IT’S ALL TOO GOD DAMN QUIET
I want to Bang
i want to bang
on my piANO KEYS!
Nobody likes to be preached to about relationships. Therefore, nobody should read the rest of this post.
My mom has recently been complaining that, in her current relationship, she and her partner can’t communicate. She says that since they can’t talk about anything, they aren’t having any fun. While I agree that it’s very difficult to have fun if you can’t talk, I think she has the cause and effect backwards.
You can’t just expect to go over to the partner’s house, eat, maybe have some sex, sleep, go home, and have any fun (unless the sexual chemistry is through the roof—but even then it gets old… eventually). The basis for relationships is having fun together. If you never do anything, then it’s no wonder that you can’t talk about anything, because there’s nothing to talk about.
Instead of trying to “talk out” your communication problems1, I suggest that you suggest things to do together. You know, hiking, swimming, going to a movie in the theater, dancing, whatever. It doesn’t need to be big and exciting, just something. Something besides sitting at home doing nothing.
After you’re doing things like this twice a month at the very least, I assure you that the larger of your other problems will solve themselves.
1As Tom Lehrer puts it, “I feel that if a person can’t communicate, the very least he can do is to shut up!”
Just did my Low Limit Texas Hold’em speech in speech 101 today. I thought I did pretty well, but the evaluators didn’t. Out of the three evaluators, 30 graded points, I got only two fives (scale of 1 to 5). Nuts.
I gave everybody at least a couple fives, because there were things that each person did really well. But sometimes people are afraid to give “perfect” scores. I did get a lot of fours.
I agree with what they were saying. It was a 7 minute speech, and there were 15 or more minutes worth of content, which I think was my greatest flaw. One person noticed that. I had to hurry a little, and I couldn’t define (and redefine) my terms very well because of the 7 minute maximum.
On the other hand, it came across really well to the couple of people who had experience with Poker. I even recruited a fellow (Clif) to our poker night. He plays $100 buy-in tournaments once a month, so I wonder whether he’s better than us. He probably is. That’ll be good. If not, even better, because he obviously carries cash. :-)
It seems I have an Ego problem. Yesterday I joined Orkut, and I’ve heard that it works something like Ego helium. But it was just what I needed to realize how large my head already was. Now I wonder how long it’s gone on, and how long it’s been noticeable to observant others.
There’s a major problem with it, too. I can’t get any composition done because I’m too busy listening to what I’ve written over and over and telling myself how brilliant it is. Something like when a game becomes playable so that the developers waste all their time playing it, even when it’s not very good yet. Not to mention that my written work becomes so perfect that I have no desire to correct it1.
I’m hoping writing about it will help smother it. Perhaps I should go on another learning binge; that’s usually enough to humble me at least a little.
1Except the Perl 6 Synopsis 3. I’m entirely unhappy with how that’s turning out. Thankfully, Damian is there to fix the abrupt, casual wording and unclear details.
Ack! Speech 101 was terrible today. I mean, it was fun, as usual, but I forgot that I was supposed to prepare a presentation. So I got up there and winged it, and as expected, stated my thoughts in a coherent, intelligent manner.
No, just kidding. I naturally fumbled around, made it blatantly obvious that I didn’t prepare, and said “um” (the word of the day not to say) more than anybody else in the class! Next time I guess I’ll prepare.
Hopefully my GameDev presentation tomorrow goes more smoothly, providing I have something to present.
I went to a yoga meditation today. One word: Ow. Pain in the muscles. But I’m definitely going back. My body doesn’t get much physical exercise outside my fingers (which may be the strongest fingers in the world :-p), and although painful, it felt so good. It also made me realize how utterly out of my control my body is.
Bearing weight is supposed to be good for bone mass, which you start losing when you’re 25. So I ought start bearing some weight before I turn 25 and my bones realize they didn’t have any mass in the first place…
And I don’t think my eventual geek-loving lover would mind so much if I had a muscle here or there. Or Karlin, for that matter, who’s BACK IN TOWN AS OF TONIGHT. I am so happy! (For the unaware but misplacedly interested, she was my girlfriend for two and a half years, and we get along fantastically. Forget whomsoever I might be with at the moment, we’ll still cuddle and have a brilliant connection. The fact that I’m not with anybody at the moment only brightens the situation :-)
Well, I got Amanda… sortof. I have to remember that life always throws a curve-ball, no matter what I think I’m prepared for. I asked her out, and her reply was, in its greatest essence, “yes, but.”
So I think I’ll follow through, take her out somewhere, and see where it goes. Judging by her enthusiasm (er, lack thereof) I’m not going to be expecting too much.
But she’s a cutie, so I’m giving it a shot, of course :-).
All what you populate
The Taken one
Babelfish poetry for “I want all you people to shut the fuck up.”
Victoria’s gone. Sucks. :-(